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Nick
Male
Lakewood. CO
United States - Share
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- About Me...
- 4 days after the outbreak officially occurred, it's just now starting to hit the town. Seems someone choked on a fast food burrito while complaining to the manager about the drive-thru. As he gasped for breath, he inadvertently bit the manager's head open while grasping for whatever he could. The hot sauce from the guy's teeth made direct contact with the manager's brain, and all hell broke loose. Don't ask me to explain the science behind mexican food and zombies, I just know it happened. You wouldn't know man, you weren't there.
Then again, this is fourth or fifth hand information. Some guy heard through his wife that saw some guy on the news choking and BAM! Zombies. Who the fuck knows for sure.
"Habenero-heads", as they are now being called, have been running rampant since.
I've been moving through the city since the outbreak occurred, trying to keep a damn wireless connection on my laptop. I lost the connection at my house after beating a zombie to death with my modem. Bastard interrupted my porn session.
First Rule - Do not fight zombies with blue balls.
Second Rule - Do NOT FIGHT ZOMBIES WITH BLUE BALLS!
Third Rule - Breaking of the first two rules is acceptable only when relief includes desecration of zombie corpses.
Fourth Rule - No shoes, no shirts.
Fifth and Final Rule - If this is your first time fighting zombies, you're the bait.
- At the time of the zombie outbreak I was...
- Eating McDonald's, which, according to a zombie I captured, tastes remarkably similar to human brains.
- Weapon of choice for fighting zombies...
- Whatever's in my hands at the time.
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Stuck.
I'd stay off the highways. It's not bad enough that everyone and their mother is trying to get the fuck out of dodge, most of them have succumb to the affliction in the process. Zombie infested parking lots. No chance of getting through them at all.
It's hard to say what else is near the barricade that hasn't already been looted. I haven't gotten much info from anyone who's come inside lately. I think most of them are still too shaken up from what's been going on to even think straight. The las… Continue
It's hard to say what else is near the barricade that hasn't already been looted. I haven't gotten much info from anyone who's come inside lately. I think most of them are still too shaken up from what's been going on to even think straight. The las… Continue
Posted on September 4, 2008 at 11:46pm — 4 Comments
Remember that ugly dog thing from my last blog?
We just got hit by one at the parking lot on the south side of the mall. I'm bringing it back to the barricade for an autopsy to find out what the fuck it is, but it didn't make things easy for us.
Fucker took down that Mike guy from Alaska before I was able to take it out though. Poor bastard was just on vacation. He told me that the day before everything went wrong, he finally managed to stand up on the surfboard without falling right over. "I should have spent the summer snowboarding," was t… Continue
Fucker took down that Mike guy from Alaska before I was able to take it out though. Poor bastard was just on vacation. He told me that the day before everything went wrong, he finally managed to stand up on the surfboard without falling right over. "I should have spent the summer snowboarding," was t… Continue
Posted on September 3, 2008 at 11:30pm —
New species?
I stumbled across two of these things tearing apart a zombie. Not even live flesh, and these things were having a feast. I'd say these could be man's new best friend, but they left the walking corpse alone as soon as they saw me. I unloaded a few sho… Continue
Posted on July 31, 2008 at 11:29am — 10 Comments
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THIS IS UTTER DISGRACEFUL, IF I NEED TO ANOTHER MONILITH CREATURE I REQUIRE 400! GIVE ME FOUR-HUNDRED!
FOR NOW, I WILL REPLENISH MY WARRIOR CREATURES WITH THE AMOUNT WE HAVE!
Hey, Chris here, i was wondering, has anyone tried to make a vaccine out of Campion? While I understand that that may be impossible due to it's extreme virility, but how about other retro viruses?
I mean c'mon, it's worth a shot. Campion is a hig...
what happened to the other 25 people?
150 survivors... damn it.
Send them to me, than collect the other 250.
And send them directly to my page, not in a blog.
Umm, did you really think 400 people would go quietly with you? You should of checked them first.
Specialist Matthew Trebilcock. 1st Inf. Div. Im the last one of my squad left. We parachuted in bout an hour after the shit hit the fan. Most of my squad was slaughtered after the first few minutes of hitting the dirt. Lost the rest amidst the cha...
you are one of several U.S Military Soldiers and reporters present at the disasterous battle of yonkers. Where will you go? what will you do?
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and sailors are cute.
:D
haha, I'm pretty lame.
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