Craig Sabin's Blog (6)

The scream of tires, a silent beat, and then the unmistakeable sound of two cars colliding, metal folding and twisting. Officer Kopalski winced involuntarily before the training kicked in. He keyed his shoulder mike. Please let there be an officer on scene. "TC 59-3 reporting a collision, heard... about a block east. Please advise, over."

He released the transmit button, and furiously waved the uptown traffic on. It was hot underneath his protective gear. The white gloves…

"They're no big deal."

"Okay..."

"They're slow. Just keep your pace up."

"..."

"Look, dude, I'm a junior this year. I got a girlfriend. I'm gonna need the room sometimes."

"So what do you do if they catch you?"

"You don't let them catch you. It's very simple. One of them comes towards you, walk away. They're slow, like I keep saying."

"Yeah, but if they catch you while you're not looking..."

"(sigh) You don't let them catch you. Look,…

Ask anyone. They call me "The Hammer." Because I negotiate aggressively.

I been in labor management for thirty years. When things get tight financially, the city always talks about laying off workers to meet their budgets. Fuckin' asshole politicians goin' around, promising whatever the fuck to get elected. Since the '80s, it's been tax cuts, right? So they cut the taxes, then just turn it on the city employees who do all the work, and say, "Sorry, we can't afford it no more." But we…

I'm a subway train engineer on the R line. Been on the R since it was the RR, and that's thirty years now. I was in my two year countdown towards retirement when the zombies started popping up. Now I'll never retire. They'll have to pull the lever from my death-stiff fingers to get me out of this cab.

It's not the pension I lost. Now that the city is broke dealing with the Z's, and we ain't getting any help from FEMA since DC got overrun, all of us city employees have been well and…

In New York, we had the zombie problem down!

Truth to tell, we felt bad for all you suburban/rural folks. You're so spread out, it's difficult to get a handle on things. In Levittown, PA, we heard that a zombie attacked the power plant, and the power went out during the struggle. Everyone went outside to see what was going on, and wham! No more Levittown.

In NYC, word spread pretty quickly what we were up against. If zombies attacked a high rise or the projects, they didn't get…

An Oral History of the Zombie Apocalypse from a New Yorker

"Hey. I'm not saying it weren't weird, right? We New Yorkers, we put up with a lot-- crime, garbage strikes, fuckin' 9-11-- but zombies were something else again. Right? Like who am I talkin' to?

"First mention of 'em in the New York Post, I hardly noticed. That fuckin' rag's been saying the world is ending since Clinton got elected, and after awhile, you tune out. But then, I saw one of 'em myself. I remember, it was a…