Feb.8,2009

2 weeks into the journey. Sometimes I wonder where the time goes. It seems like just yesterday everything fell apart and only hours ago that I began my trek north. Too many times, I've relaxed my mind, become listless, and drift off into my memories. I see who I was before, all the people I loved once. Then I see the death of my lod self through the death of my loved ones. How weak I was. How weak I still am. But I'm growing stronger. I can feel my survival instincts sharpening, focusing. There is an inner animal laying dormant in my heart, and he's beginning to stir. He wants to live, and will do anything to meet this end. I pray to retain my intellegence.
Too many times I've drifted off, and become an easy target. I know it's only a matter of time before I learn my lesson. That is, provided I survive. I've already had one close call. I was using the highway through what I assume was West Virginia to get through the mountains. Cars were parked nearly bumper to bumper, making the climb a little harder than expected. By now, I had such a mismatched jumble of clothes and equipment, and a lot of it was packed onto my back. Everytime I made to turn around two vehicles parked close, my pack would catch on something, and I'd swear I could smell the flesh rotting off the hand grabbing me. I wasted so much time and energy with every mistake. Too much time, too much energy.
The sun had begun dipping below the mountains, and I knew it was too dangerous to keep moving. I had to be careful in my selection of shelter: First, I needed to find an unlocked door. I was hoping to find an SUV, but I couldn't find an unlocked one by sundown, so I made due with just a sedan. I have no idea why so many people locked their doors. What are the odds that you'll ever need to return, let alone be able to to find your car in this infinite field of vehicles. Nonetheless, it;s almost dark, and I'm getting desperate, and I stop being careful, watchful, or quiet. Dashing between cars, I hardly looked at anything but the locks, so I didn't notice one of the blood-stained broken windows. I got yanked back so hard I nearly fell flat on my back. I hadn't even realized what had happened until I felt my arm pulled up and pressure started on my forearm. I whipped around, staring straight into the decomposing face of a ghoul. I grabbed its face and shoved it off my arm just in time. Had it not been for my thick coat, I'd probably be shambling now. It was still belted into the car, so all I had to do was break its grip and back off.
I was scooting backwards on my ass, backing away from the zombie, until I backed into another car. It had started moaning so I needed to act fast. I keep a survival knife with me, so I held its head still and slid the knife through the soft gel of its eye, and shoved through the bone behind it into its brain. Once it stopped twitching, I slid the knife out, wiped it clean on the corpse's shirt, and jumped into the nearest car and locked the door. I miss my family.