I sat there panting out of breath. I gaze over to the crowd now looking like it was growing by the second. "god i hope they didn't see me jump in here". I look around the cab, i see the keys, a bag of lickerish, a glock, box of rounds, and a can of soda."oh boy breakfast...", i sit in the cab and just look at the zombies as they calm down and separate. it was about a hour and a half before only about 2 to 4 zombies were left just stumbling around. I made the mistake of looking and seeing my dad and uncle both literally torn in two from the hip and what looked like half my dads left arm missing. i sat there and cried. I then hear a voice in my head tell me "who's it gonna be? you or them?". I grab the glock open the door and run and grab the dropped weapons. i run into the truck and drop them there. "THEM", I run into the barn and grab every thing i can get from water to old doe meat. i stock the truck with what i could, then made my way to the back fence. I drive past a couple dead cows, and survey the fields. "looks clean enough for me". I drive into Munster the closest city nearby. I get into town and see the streets littered with corpses of dead zombies. "Oh right this is a hunting community". I glance at the gas tank, almost empty. "thank god there's a station at the top of this hill". i drive to the top of the hill and park next to a pump. I grab my new glock and my dads 12 gauge. I walk to the door "only one way to do this..." i sigh caulk my 12 gauge and walk in. Shotty level with my eyes i see no threats. I go behind the cashiers desk, press pump 13. I look up and i see a mussel pointed in between my eyes. "sorry sir or mam im just getting gas for my truck outside" i look past the mussel and see a long haired biker dude."what are you doing with such a nice glock and shotgun?" says the biker. "protection no zombies getting me off guard" i reply. "well i surprised you, so i would think you would be as good to me as dead". you can hear the safety switch click. "SIR please i will help you with anything just please don't harm me". "How can you possibly help me?" "well how good are you with a sniper rifle?" "not very" the man replies. "well i am", i glance at the truck. i say "you defend this gas station don't you?". "ya so what?" "i will pay you back for the gas with my skill, tonight i will keep this place safe". He says "hmm well i would want one decent night of sleep for once.. deal". Later that night i sat atop the gas station picking off targets and blowing up propane takes cleverly placed earlier. around 2:30 in the morning i started to get drowsy. The next thing i remember was waking up to a beautiful sunrise. I stand up stretch and look down at my feet. i see my rifle, a box of rounds, a soda, and a note. I read the note -Not to self!! dont fall asleep!! you must shoot your share of zombies...- "oh god" at that point i knew i was boned. I looked around the station. Nothing was moving or even in dismay. "huh maybe the zombies stopped attacking us and...." cut short in that sentence i walk into the store and see the biker torn to ribbons a few zombies still trying to beat him even more dead. all i could do was just puke. then i realized where i was and that two threats still remain in the room. I reach for a fire axe on the table near by putting it through its head and having it collapse right there. I look up and see a blur of red yellow and something sharp. the next thing i know im holding of a zombie with my fore arm. i just reached for its hair and smashed it against the tile right next to me. "god... i need a break from all this". i sigh and gather more weapons that i find in the bathroom. i fill up some gas cans and put them in the back.

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FRANK ® Classic Comment by FRANK ® Classic on April 5, 2009 at 9:16pm
I like it. Pretty straight forward, right to the action. Can't wait to see what happens in Dallas.
The Bruin Comment by The Bruin on February 20, 2009 at 11:45pm
This is pretty good Drake! I like how you set the narrative as being your immediate actions instead of post action which lends immediacy to what you are doing.

If I were to make recommendations, I would say that adding a little detail to your trip might flesh teh story out a little more...consider these questions...What types of things did you see on your drive to the gas station? What about the drive to Dallas? Is there a point during one of those trips that it almost felt normal before you saw something that brought it all back to reality?

On the other hand, most people, when they are in such high intensity situations don't remember such details so this gives your story more realism in many ways...

In the end, it is all how you want to play it and I think this is a fine piece of writing for a guy your age...It's not a bad idea to look at other writers and see how they put things together as well...Well done lad!

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