UGGGHHHH!

I think i just might go crazy! This whole situation has been so surreal, that i believe my mind is trying to say "it isn't true, this isn't real." And the thing is, i'm starting to fall for my own mind's tricks. My family are all starting to stare, and laugh. Although, it's understandable because i tend to laugh at myself and my funny/deranged mumblings. What is insanity, anyway? Is it when you scream and everyone else whispers, or is it when you fight for what's right, even when everyone else thinks your wrong? I must find something to keep my mind occupied. Please, give me suggestions. I need something to do or else i think i might just become an emotional zombie.